Sedaris Helps Out

When I returned this evening, after visiting the puppet factory in which Tellon the Alien will soon be born, I found all the cashmere pillows in my apartment gone. Sedaris was sitting on the couch, smiling serenely as he whittled a life-sized chipmunk out of sandalwood.

"Where hast thou taken the pillows?" I asked, casually. He grinned.

"I did it for you, Blogagaard. I want to help with Operation Mayhem. I want to help you move. All of this, all of this space, is the space I have cleared for you in my heart."

Stunned, I sat down beside David Sedaris in a pile of wood shavings. We sat in silence. Outside, a freed bird sang, and the smell of lilacs drifted in through my window screen. A child laughed, zipping into traffic on a razor scooter.

"I just want you to be happy," Sedaris said, holding up the finished chipmunk to the light. "That's all I've ever really wanted."

14 comments:

Michelle said...

Did you like the rendition of "Free Bird" in Elizabethtown? My favorite scene.

Lex Ham Rand said...

I LOVED that movie, and the rendition of "Free Bird" was second only to the Christmas Pageant scene in Simon Birch (which we all know was really A Prayer for Owen Meany but "not approved" by John Irving.

Blogagaard said...

What in the hell are you two talking about?

Moncrief Speaks said...

You and Sedaris sleep in the same bed, right?

Blogagaard said...

Nope. We can't fit. He sleeps in the gray chair in my closet, which I've turned into a "library". it's a recliner, so Sedaris doesn't mind.

mikeythebison said...

There is enough buisness to constitute puppet factories in the TC area? Crazy!

Blogagaard said...

Yep. I think their big money comes from corporate excecutive parties. They like to have puppet look-a-likes built to tease retirees at parties or something.

Something dirty said...

Why are you commisioning a puppet? I am confused.

Lex Ham Rand said...

I want to see a puppet show with Bloggy and Sedaris. Like Punch and Judy, only with words as weapons!

Blogagaard said...

That's because you're out of the loop, SD! I am making a short comedic film this summer. I will become an alien.

Blogagaard said...

That's because you're out of the loop, SD! I am making a short comedic film this summer. I will become an alien.

Lex Ham Rand said...

Alien Bloggy puppet punches Sedaris puppet with word-fists!

And then the flaming Free Bird descends!

Blogagaard said...

uh oh. Rand's off his meds.

Again.

Lex Ham Rand said...

Meds? Those are meds? Mommy told me they were candy!

"Mooooommm!!! Bloggy says I'm s'posed to be on meds!!"

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