Part One
Chapter One
The Russian drove and I stared out my passenger window, watching Wisconsin blur past. The snowy fields were blue with moonlight and the farmhouses were dark with 2 A.M. sleep. I watched the ditch for starving, possibly suicidal deer. Miles went by. Eventually I saw two shining eyes looking back at me, and I warned the Russian.
“Yes, Alexander,” Nikolai said, dropping the Jaguar’s speed from ninety to seventy-five. “I see your deer.”
This was our first exchange since Minneapolis. Just a few hours previous Nikolai had knocked on my apartment door. He was six foot seven inches tall. He had a broad chest, muscled arms, and a red beard. He said he worked for a man I’d never met, my grandfather on my father’s side. I was to return to Pennsylvania with Nikolai and meet the mysterious old man, who apparently was dying, and if I did there’d be a significant inheritance in it for me. The whole melodramatic proposition was ridiculous, of course, but here I was anyway, speeding through the night with a complete stranger, still unsure if I was being kidnapped or if the Russian really worked for my grandfather.
“Are you getting tired?” I asked him.
“No,” Nikolai said, staring at the road. “I am not weary.”
“How long have you been driving?”
“Since I left Pennsylvania.”
“Straight through?”
“I stop for gasoline. I urinate and buy hot dogs.”
“The essentials.”
“Yes,” Nikolai said. “The essentials.”
I watched the blurred white line in the center of the road for a few minutes. Nikolai murmured something to himself. I thought he spoke English carefully, like someone spelling out a fourteen letter last name for a receptionist.
“Where you from, Nikolai?”
“I live in Pennsylvania, with your grandfather. I have told you this.”
“No, I mean originally.”
“I lived in Moscow until America.”
“Ah,” I said, smiling. “I knew it. I knew you were Russian.”
Nikolai turned to me. The electric white dashboard light cast a strange glow across his face, as if he were holding up a flashlight to his chin. I wondered if he was going to punch me.
“It is late,” he said. “You should rest.”
“Okay,” I said. I curled back against my door, which was locked, and slid my face against the cold glass of my passenger window. More Wisconsin slipped by. I didn’t see any more deer.
8 comments:
Sweet, Bloppo!
Nice work.
I know you are dying for a nice long comment. The trouble is, I don't know you well enough to know if you are looking for serious feedback or not. For example, would you be offended if the only comment I had made reference to the urine and hotdogs line and all the hidden fun there? Or should I treat this very respectfully and comment on the actual work? I'm so new to all this and have never attempted a book at all. Perhaps the greatest compliment I could give you is that I wanted to read more? How's that. It's the truth.
That's fine, Lucas. I was just lazy today and didn't want to write a new post. No hidden artistic agenda, really. Just like people to know what I'm working on.
Thank you and thank you.
I guess I'm in the same boat with lucas. My pique is interested.
The first chapter is absolutely crucial, especially for any first time writer without a built-in audience. It basically has to be as addictive as crystal meth, but in words.
Mmmmmmmmmmm. Meth.
I just realized I'd mispelled titled "tittled" in the heading of this post. I just had to write for one sentence, and even that needed to be edited.
Will Blogagaard's obession with glittering hooters spell his downfall?
Tune in to find out!
Post a Comment